The Bottom: What Surrender Looks Like

The profundity of change that I have experienced in my life over the past three-ish years did not come from my discovery of the quiet power of the breath on the Greatest Day, which first brought light into the darkness, nor of all the guidance Jerry gave me with respect to cultivating energy through centered, embodied awareness and the consciousness it develops. All of that was necessary, but it wasn't sufficient.

The other crucial piece happened when I hit Bottom. That day, I looked at the shambles my life had become, felt the pain and anguish in my heart, and declared that I would change everything, literally everything, if that's what it took to bring myself back to health.

I need to be very, very clear about this, because the universe took me at my word. It asked: Everything? You will truly let go of everything that blocks your flow?

I'd be lying if I said that I never hesitated. I hesitate still. The lives we live, no matter how attenuated, tend to give us a certain comfort. After all, we know it here. We know our way around.

But really think about it: if you are deeply unhappy, what do you gain by holding onto anything that doesn't serve you? Are you not saying, in essence, "I choose to suffer?"

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